Driving Commandments

Review of the Pope's rules of the road

Those of you scurrying through the amber lights better beware: the Pope has released his "10 driving commandments," which have been inspired by incidents of road rage, injury and death while driving. Drivers who want to ensure they're on the highway to heaven may want to glance over the list. It addresses issues such as rude gestures, yielding to pedestrians and speeding, yet leaves out current issues such as driving environmentally-friendly vehicles. Considering that the Pope rides around in a bulletproof popemobile in Vatican City where the speed limit barely reaches 30 m.p.h. doesn't exactly make him extremely knowledgeable on the subject - but let's see what he has to say.

The Pope's 10 Driving Commandments

1. "You shall not kill."
   Good idea. Killing people is bad.
2. "The road shall be for you a means of communion between people and not of mortal harm."
   The roads are used for far more tasks then simply connecting people. We drive to run errands, to go to work, to relieve stress or simply to drive for the sake of driving. The Pope doesn't seem to realize the complexities of the relationship between man and automobile.
3. "Courtesy, uprightness and prudence will help you to deal with unforeseen events."
   his one is amusing. As much as people would like courtesy and good sense from other drivers, this just isn't reality. We can appreciate his attempt at reducing instances of road rage, but first he'd have to rid the world of unintelligent drivers.
4. "Be charitable and help your neighbor in need, especially victims of accidents."
   No argument here.
5. "Cars shall not be for you an expression of power and domination or an occasion for sin."
   Many of you will be cowering your head in shame after reading this one. And guys, it looks like you can't use your cars to pick up chicks anymore. The Pope just wants to take all the fun out of owning a car.
6. "Charitably convince the young and not-so-young not to drive when they are not in a fit condition."
   Completely agree. Too many people get behind the wheel when they shouldn't. Drinking, upset emotions, tiredness and certain medications are just some of the things that can affect your ability to drive. Do everyone a favor and only drive when you can place 100 percent of your concentration on the job at hand.
7. "Support the families of accident victims."
   Isn't this a repeat of number four? Looks like the Pope wasn't given enough time to whip up these rules.
8. "Bring guilty motorists and their victims together so they can experience forgiveness."
   This may help to reduce cases of road rage. However, it's unlikely that all victims who have lost family members to car accidents would be willing to forgive the guilty.
9. "On the road, protect the more vulnerable party."
   This one is most likely referring to pedestrians, but we may be mistaken.
10. "Feel responsible towards others."
    This should be the number-one commandment! It's basically the key to good driving.

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